Monday, November 27, 2006

Have I lost the plot?

A 6-month break in Spain, 4 well paying job offers in Dubai on the table, yet all I can think of is moving back to Spain and writing. Have I lost the plot?

A good friend of mine thinks I'm afraid of getting back to a job here, because I think I will like it and get sucked back in, and then not go to Spain again.

Friends are getting promoted, traveling the world business class for work, investing in houses, climbing their career success ladders, driving BMW's.

I quit that life and am learning Spanish. Why? Because that's what I want to do. Why? It's fun. What will I do with the language? no friggin' clue.

I have a bit of money in the bank, and I believe that if you are educated, have common sense and a drive - money will always come in. My objective in life is not to own a Ferrari, or have a house on the beach, or to be a CEO, I just want to live life to the fullest.

People spend all their lives working their asses off, saving money for later. For when exactly? What about now, when we are young, free and kicking? It's not like we will be on the street if we do what we want now, right?

I guess it all depends on what you want from your life.

It's difficult for me to get a good job in Spain. Mainly because I'm not fluent in Spanish yet, and nor am I an EU citizen. Work permits and visa regulations put alot of red tape, which if I get through - I wouldn't even earn 1/4th of what I might get paid here.

So why am I leaving this comfortable job-in-hand haven to live a completely unpredictable and unstable life?

Does it scare me? No. Do I doubt my confidence? Sometimes.

My 4-years in the corporate communications world were fulfilling. And though I still have a lot to learn, the thought of getting back into it - especially in Dubai - is repulsive to me.

If I can afford to do what I want to for another year or so, why shouldn't I?

If people can make a living, living abroad and writing - why can't I?

Nothing I have written has been published yet. This could take years. Often I loose my confidence and this little voice inside me says, Abha get real - you had your 6-months of fun in Spain, now get back to reality. Get a job and focus on your 'career'. Today was one of those days when all I did was read success stories of people who have done what I want to, and have succeeded.

If you don't try, you will never know. This is what I want to do.

Living abroad, traveling, learning a new language, writing, teaching English does not equal being a bum.


All I know is that if I give up now - I will regret it....

Have I lost the plot?
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