It's OK, it's the festive season

If there is anyone out there who is not pigging out this festive season, still exercising and therefore still looking great in tight jeans, how do you do it!? How do you resist indulging in sweet and savory delights put in front of you, begging to be eaten? Answer: you don't.

This week (and I presume the next one too) has seen me relieving my year's nonsensical preoccupations (what am I doing with my life, why am I in Spain, I have a white hair (!), when am I going to clean the cobwebs in my room, etc etc) by eating full-fat food and dessert, nonstop. No exercise. No real work. Lots of sleep. Lots movies. Lots of unproductive thinking. Lots of nothing.

It's great to have these days but it's hard to really enjoy them when you don't have a proper job. I feel guilty; like I have no right to take time off. Of course that's not true. Everyone has the right to take time off. Even if they don't have any concrete achievements to justify hours of absolute lethargy.

Much needed conclusive note: Come January and it's going to be crazy again, so sit down and enjoy every morsel of that molten-chocolate-whipped-cream cake.

Winter Smells

Has anyone realized how good people smell in winter? I'm a sucker for people who smell good. There is nothing more momentarily pleasurable than someone walk past you and you get a fresh whiff of perfume, cologne, soap, cream, or even hair gel.

I have an 8:30am class to teach every morning. When I get into the metro, I'm so busy identifying smells I can't concentrate on the newspaper I have to read. Palmolive honey, Pleasures for men, Davidoff Cool Waters, Loreal Wet Look Moose, Johnson's Baby Cologne, Axe for men and sometimes I even smell the peppermint freshness of mouthwash! (Yes, I have a super sensitive nose). I identify the smell and all of a sudden I see him/her doing his/her morning getting dressed routine and all of a sudden I feel like I know them. Is that sick?

People stink in summer. They sweat and they stink. Winter has that perpetual morning freshness. The temperature is cool, the wind is cold and minty. Everyone seems clean. Everyone smells great. This might be the only reason I don't mind winter.

Happy winter!

What's the longest word in the English dictionary?

Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis

Who would have thought ay.

One of the best videos I have seen in a while. Happy Sunday!

I feel ugly

Ever had one of those days where you wake up, look in the mirror, and go "ugh"? You feel worn and exhausted. All your facial imperfections seem magnified. You see countless blackheads and scars on your skin that has never seemed drier. Your lips are chapped and blood-red from the wine you drank the night before. Your eyes are puffy, you have dark circles -half from being tired, half from the black-eyeliner that you never take off properly; your hair seems listless, your nail-polish is chipped, you feel fat.

Today is one of those days for me. It's been a long time since I had one of these days. I'm not depressed or anything, it's a day that resonates how you cannot afford to stop exercising, you should not drink every night, passive smoking is as bad as smoking yourself, you need 8-hours of sleep -- at least a few times a week, you cannot live on Chinese food and coffee, and that you are totally responsible for your physical and mental well-being.

Lately, I have been working hard and partying harder. I have been having a great time but today when I woke up I was momentarily disturbed as I looked in the mirror and asked myself, was it worth it!?

I think I need to balance things out a bit. Sometimes you don't have to seize every moment, most of the time there is tomorrow, so you just need to chill more often than not.

Saying goodbye and moving on

Some thoughts that have been looming in my mind lately -- subject of my latest post on Vagablogging.

Quote from the Jay-Z of blogging

"I always believed that those of us who were creating personal media online would win. I still hold out hope that when we do so, it's not because we were willing to fight dirtier (or work cheaper) than the media that inspired us, but rather because we could do a better job of making media than the legacy media does today. Congratulations to everybody involved for being willing to indulge in a little bit of the most positive sort of creative destruction." -- Anil Dash, Vice President at Six Apart (makers of Typepad, Moveable Type, LiveJournal and Vox)

Some friends you just can't do without!

M: So will you miss my wisdom when I move to the US?
Me: Why, you won't have electricity or a computer?
M: Yes, but our time will be so different.
Me: It's super cheap for me to call the States.
M: OK, you can reach me on my 1800-GODS-GIFT-TO-WOMEN Number

Hahahah. What would I do without you!? :D

Question of the day

How personal should your blog be?

Dating: The Three-Month Twitch

I have been in the "dating" sphere for the last 10-years, and I have not been able to keep a man in my life for more than 3-months at a stretch -- a consistent end post the damned if you do, damned if you don't theory.

Various reasons for this, all bullshit, but reasons nonetheless -- or excuses rather. For example:
-"You are too good to be with a jerk like me." (huh?)
-"I respect you too much to be dating you casually." (did I say I wanted a serious relationship!??)
-"You are the type I would take home to my mum, and right now I just want to get laid." (dude, I don't want to meet your mum!)
-"How can you want to date me knowing it's not going to last? What is the point?" (Urrr...nothing lasts forever, and whatever happened to enjoying the present?)
-"I am scared of commitment." (I don't want to marry you!)
-"It's not you, it's me." (My all time favourite cliche :)

I've had the odd "I'm really still in love with my ex" thing, which is fine and acceptable -- but the boys have not had the balls to tell me that whilst breaking-up. The odd mutual break-up "we like each other but not enough to keep dating" shpeal has been the cleanest cut-out.

However, what might be interesting to note (as I choose to humiliate myself publicly on this blog) is that all these guys went on to have serious relationships after me. I don't know what to think of that, and I rather not. I do wish they would have told me the truth though. I've been half-tempted to ring them all and ask them "what did I not do right?"

Maybe I was too easy. Maybe I should've played those stupid games that everyone plays. Maybe I gave too much too soon. Maybe I didn't give enough. Maybe we shouldn't have gotten involved in the first place. Fuck knows.

Anyway, so I'm currently involved in something. I don't want to tag it, there is no point. (Oh, I also recently learnt that "dating" is different from a "relationship" -- I didn't know that. Yeah, I'm pretty clueless when it comes to men. And I'm sick of trying to figure this whole being with someone concept. It's overrated and it gives me a headache.)

So post my confidence being shattered a million times and my therefore assumed vulnerability, my dating mind frame has evolved into this: I date someone because I'm enjoying myself. The minute it's more painful than fun, you get out.

Coming back to my point: it has been 3-months since I have been with someone now and that momentary realization (that I don't want to dwell on which is why I'm ranting it on this blog) has made me think about my past hook-ups and how pass this duration and within a week it's over.

I know it's not fair to compare your relationships. Each one is completely different, they have nothing to do with each other. But, when the pattern repeats itself on numerous occasions, you can't help but wonder.

It's like the guys had a timer that started beeping come the 3-month mark and were afraid that what they are involved in is nothing but a bomb waiting to explode.

It's not like I'm consciously counting days, but it's hard not to be aware of this possibly apocalyptic phase of my dating life.

I don't know what that says about me. Did I just compare myself to a bomb waiting to explode? I really don't know what that says about me. Sigh.

Anyway, there are a few thoughts that help me deal with stuff like this:
- You can't make anyone do anything they don't want to: if someone doesn't want to be with you there is no convincing him into it.
- It's all about personal growth: whether in or out of an involvement with someone, as long as you've grown in some way (together or apart), it was worth it.
- Nobody dies of a broken heart: you fall, you get up, you dust off, you move on.
- Everything happens for a reason.

Someone once told me that you attract what you are ready for. Maybe subconsciously this is all I have ever been ready for? Or, all I am ready for at the moment?

Is this normal or is there something seriously wrong with me? Do I need to see a psychiatrist?

Parents Check In Madrid

Every time I swear that I need to blog here at least once a day, something happens and I land up not blogging for days.

Normally, I don't have a good excuse: tired, not inspired, too much blogging other places, hungover...but this time I have a very valid excuse: my parents were here!

Yes, they came to see what on earth I am doing with my life here in Spain. We spent 5 action-packed days in Madrid, together at all waking hours and we didn't want to tear out each others eyes. :)

I don't think I have spent so much time with my parents in the whole 5 years I lived at home in Dubai. It was superb.

Although their million dollar question of where will what I'm doing right now take me later wasn't answered, they appreciated the way I live and understand why I don't want to change my life yet.

Was sad to see them leave, only because I don't know when I will see them again.

Harta

"Andas sola?"

(estamos bailando)

"Si" le dije. (normalmente miento por que siempre conozco por lo menos 5 personas cuando voy a bailar, ayer no vi nadie y era poco difícil a mentir)

"Tengo coche, te llevo a casa luego si quieres"

Que no! no te conozco de nada, porque voy a sentar en tu coche a las 4 de la mañana!?

Llevo bailando casi cinco años, y aun no he encontrado un grupo/persona con quien consistamente puedo quedar a ir a bailar.

Con respeto de los chicos: algunos quieren llevarte a casa a...sabéis por que...y si no te interesa, ellos no les interesa a ir a bailar contigo. Y los grupos -- si no sales con ellos fuera de pista de baile, se alejan u ofenden, y no te llaman cuando salen.

Los chicas guapas que bailan bien, 99% tienen pareja de baile con quien salgan, o novio -- y normalmente es difícil conocerlas. Yo como no bailo profesionalmente, y tengo mala suerte con chicos con quien salgo -- no estoy en este 99%.

*sigh* y sigo yendo sola.

Ahora hace un frió que te cagas y es muy dificil animarte ir a bailar a la una de la mañana cuando vas sola. Y ahi tienes que contestar este mierda pregunta te chicos ascerosos "andas sola?"

Es una putada.

My first travel-writer interview!

I must be doing something right!

Check it out here!

Home is where you lay your hat

Dealing with the idea of "home" is the latest subject of my Vagablogging post.

My Perm Days...UGHHHH!

You know how you look at old photos and go, OH MY GOD, what was I thinking!? Why did I do that to my hair!?

Well a dear friend decided to post this on Stalkbook today, and of course he tagged me so that everyone can see! (Thanks Jo :)

I had permed hair for almost 2-years. Yuck. Never again.

The photo is from my days in Australia...I used to live with these two and I think we were on our way to Sydney. Wow. That was atleast 6-years ago.

After that, I cut it super short and spiky -- I liked that -- I even dyed it partially blonde. (YUP!) Then, sick of looking like a teenage boy for about 3 years -- I decided to grow my hair back and had to pass that awful in between growing stage; everyone used to call me Mogli (Yes, from Junglebook) OMG.

Yeah...I've had many bad hair periods. Now it stands long, very straight and natural brown. And that's how it's staying for a while.

Life. And Death. And My Brother.

Something awful happened to my brother a few weeks ago.

On a calm autumn night, as he was walking a friend to her car, a teenager fell out of a 4-storey building and died right infront of him.

He and his friend were the only witnesses. They had to call 911, examine the body and narrate what they saw to the police.

He has finally been able to write about it -- you can read the whole story here; it's just like a movie -- the sad thing is that it isn't.

Scary. Unnerving. Unfair. No-one should have to go through that.

How life can be shocking, so out of our own control, and so freaking unpredictable gives me the shivers and nausea.

It is not uncommon that you read stuff like this in the newspapers and you think 'holy crap', but never fathom that it could happen to someone you know.

I feel terrible that my brother had to go through something like this. He is only 17 for goodness sake. But I am so proud of how he handled the situation.

Anish, hats off to you. I love you.

Martian wake-up call

10 months in Madrid, and I've finally invested (a whole 8 Euros) in an alarm clock (who needs those in Spain anyway!?).

I had bought this 1 Euro alarm from a Chino around the corner, which kinda did the job -- even though it kept ringing randomly, and never said the correct time; as long as I reset it before going to bed, it was ok.

Well almost ok. Being late to my 8am classes for the last 2 weeks (it's hard to wake-up in winter!), I was in desperate need of a good one and this is what I bought.

Doesn't it look like it's fallen straight out of space? It's cute and it has radio -- BUT -- it also talks!! YES! IT TALKS! When the alarm goes off, it says the time "son las dos horas y catorce minutos" in an annoying female nasal voice. Why couldn't they put a deep, soft and sexy male voice so I could wake-up in different glory?

Oh well. I guess atleast I'm not going to have problems waking up now.

Facebook group of the day

I Dont care How Comfortable Crocs Are, You Look Like A Dumbass.

This one made me laugh out loud. As of this moment, it has 680,240 members haha.

Thought of the day

"If you want to kiss the sky you better learn how to kneel" -- U2, Mysterious Ways

Superstitious India

Pandit encourages man to marry his dog, to redeem himself of killing two dogs 15-years ago. This is the subject of my latest Gadling post.

Funny how a lot of stories can be found in 'Oddities' sections of online publications. Sad thing is that in India, these things are anything but odd.

(Photo: Boston Globe)